Top 20 Tracks of 2015 (As per my iPod)

Gonna get the stats in here lively. Play count in brackets.

  1. Hazel English – Fix (47). Comes with free tampon.

  2. Heems – Home feat Dev Hynes (37). Some bird broke up with him so he made a song about it I guess. Production value for days.

  3. Christine and the Queens – Christine (Paradis Remix) (31). Song’s in French. Can’t be sure but may be something to do with boursin +/- Laurent Koscielny. 

  4. Day Wave – Drag (31). Some downtempo bullshit. 

  5. Oh Wonder – Landslide (31). Christ I’m such a fucking girl. 

  6. Brenda Lee – Danke Schoen (29). If you’ve not seen Ferris Bueller’s Day Off then you are not the kind of prick I want to be talking to. 

  7. The Frighteners – I’d Rather Go Blind (28). Controversial. No girl is worth your fucking eyes mate.

  8. kiiara – Feels (28). This chick is like 10 and has like loads of problems. Like LOADS of problems.

  9. Hazel English – It’s Not Real (27). Not this bird again, FFS.

  10. Jeremih – Planes feat J Cole (27). This song is just filthy. “We both graduated, so fuck keeping it classy.”

  11. Hazel English – Never Going Home (26). FUUUUUCCKKKK

  12. Nadia Reid – Call the Days (25). I would never ever ever put my iPod on shuffle. No one needs to know what a miserably emo dickhead I am. 

  13. Selena Gomez – Good For You feat A$AP Rocky (24). She’s legal isn’t she? Selena?

  14. Danny Brown – Red 2 Go (23). I just want to break everything now. 

  15. A$AP Rocky – Canal St (23). Named after the station. If you haven’t got his album yet, why not? Why the fuck not? The drop at 55s of the rhythm section is more exhilarating than a direct kick to the ball sack.

  16. Kidkanevil – Ewok ft Ocean Wisdom (22). I just want to break everything Part II

  17. kiiara – Gold (Hippie Sabotage) (21). Because the original song was shit.

  18. kiiara – Intention (20). I definitely didn’t listen to this song that much. Fuck this.

  19. Danny Brown – Side A (18). This definitely isn’t his best song. My play count is erroneous.

  20. Snakehips – Gone feat Syd (18). Sexy times.

Disclaimer: I am 99% sure that iPod is a lying bastard. 


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